Ego Documents

#ikr 

I love my skin!

legalmexican:

he can go from Papi to Pendejo real quick

#lmao 

awwww-cute:

He wore his new boots today and was the most popular dog on the trail!

hello ladies cute feminist boy here

iwishgillianandersonwasmymom:

i am into consensual sex, i bathe, and i have gone four months without taking a human life

neptunain:

[bottles up feelings and lets them age for 10 years like a fine wine]

Anonymous
This is gonna sound so stupid but what is a fuckboy? lol

rememberingsuunday:

fuckboy symptoms:

  • timothy over here askin’ for nudes when all u did was say hello
  • connor who won’t calm down with his axe spray tryna infect ya lungs
  • colin adding #420 to his bio when he smoked weed one time
  • gregory mad cause u didn’t blow him after the first date

how to spot a fuckboy:

  • white nike tube socks with his adidas sandals
  • he wants to play 20 questions (!!!!!!!!! do not play !!!!!!!!!!! especially if there’s a “;)” involved)
  • relies on his mom but doesn’t respect women
  • looks like he just read one of jaden smith’s tweets in all of his selfies
  • can’t find the clitoris

fuckboys come in all shapes and sizes and results may vary but when he a fuckboy…he a fuckboy…and u will know

#psa 

What You Crave vs What You Need

Chocolate: Raw nuts/seeds.
Oily/Fatty Snacks: Kale, leafy greens.
Soda/Carbonated Drinks: Actual, literal bubbles.
Chips/Salty Food: Topsoil.
Cookies: Freudian psychology.
Sweet Tea: A strong Southern gentleman to take care of you.
Pasta/Carbs: Pasta/Carbs.
Ice: The sweet release of death.

Spotted in the Sunday Times sport section!

#omf 

Omfg look what Mum just sent me!!

Anonymous
have you and bertha considered marriage counseling?

mredwardrochester:

we tried that but all the guy said was, “oh my god what is she doing in this cold, damp attic this is literally breaking like 10 laws????” all therapists are swindlers

!!!!!!!!!!!!!

egoting:

Some pictures from the rally today at Columbia. So much wonderful support for my sister and I! Emma and I are truly grateful to everyone who came, and everyone who was there in spirit.